So call me crazy

Having 2 kids is chaotic. It's crazy, time

consuming, and requires 100% from you if you want to make sure that your kids are happy, healthy, and loved. I don't know why anyone does it. I applaud all you parents of multiples out there. And I know you can relate with everything I'm about to say.

There are good days but there are bad ones too. We have slowly started to pull Rosalie out of full time daycare to 1) save money and 2) transition her to a real preschool. So now that I'm home with both kids by myself for a majority of the time, I've learned some new tricks and have had to pull out a lot of heavy mommy artillery to manage my days and nights.

My mornings usually start around 6am, and after a night of broken sleep from Elijah's feedings, I haul my butt out of bed to make sure I'm awake by the time Rosalie gets up so Anthony can get ready for work. I feed both kids breakfast and Elijah is usually ready for another nap by 9. And since he doesn't sleep well unless he's being held (I'm working on that, I promise!) I am glued to the couch unless Rosalie wants a snack or a new DVD put in. I get about a 2 hour break when Rosalie takes her nap after lunch (and by break I mean a chance to quickly feed myself and maybe squeeze a DVR'ed tv episode in) but other than that, it's a juggling act between tending to the kids and keeping up with household chores until daddy gets home.

I hear the word "mommy!" about a 1000 times a day from both Rosalie and Anthony, and I pick up after all of them all day to make sure the house isn't a danger zone.  All of this while being a walking restaurant for Elijah. 

Despite all the craziness, I feel so blessed. Yah yah, it's so cliche. But seriously,  for some crazy reason, God thought that I was the appropriate human being to be put in charge of these 2 little people who need me so much. ME. I know there were better candidates out there, but still, he chose me.

Since having a second kid, I've sacrificed so many things. Not because I had to, but because I wanted to, and because I knew it was right. I've had to sacrifice most of my social life, my body, sleep, shopping for myself, and precious time with my husband. Yes, you do all that the first time around too, but just when you think you're getting some normality back, you have another child and it all goes out the window.

Your heart grows exponentially. Your patience hits new heights. You become so good at multitasking that you are practically a ninja. You get pushed off a cliff.....and then you learn to fly.

There is nowhere I would rather be more than here at home with these two little monsters. Getting Rosalie potty trained felt better than getting an A in any class I've ever taken. Seeing Elijah socially smiling for the first time was like winning the Nobel prize. Watching them grow and knowing that I am taking advantage of my time off work to be with them every single minute of every day is so rewarding and satisfying that I go to bed with a smile knowing that I may not be perfect, but to them, I'm pretty darn great.

I'm not going to lie, there are moments when I want to fall to my knees, look up to the heavens and scream "WHYYYY!!" But then all I have to do is recall all the rewarding experiences that we have had throughout the years and how much we have grown as people because of these kids. That definitely doesn't mean that I'm open to having another kid EVER, but I do have way too much to be thankful for to be sitting here acting like I'm not the happiest I've ever been. 

So even though my life may not seem exciting to you, you'd be surprised how truly amazing it is just to be needed and so very loved by two wonderful little human beings. So call me crazy, but I'm

pretty in love with this chaotic and crazy type of life. But with these two by my side, how could I not be?